No worries, folks. My baby clock is not the one being referenced here. It's some other kind of clock. This particular clock has me in a funk these days. Not a full on tsunami funk, but...more like a 'partly cloudy with a light breeze' funk, if you will. A funk nonetheless....I promise not to use the word "funk" anymore in this post...starting now.
I think I’m ready for the next part of my life. Perhaps I have been for a while. It just seems easier to tell people that I choose to be single at 25 than to have to explain exactly
why I’m single...Like I have any idea!? I've never been the kind of girl who has worried about this particular thing, and it’s not as though I’m particularly worried about it now.
I've never had relationships on the top of my priorities list. I've never been "boy-crazed" nor have I ever been the object of anyone's affection (if I were standing in a group of my friends...I'm definitely not the one that catches the attention). I'm cool with all of that. In all honesty, I actually (usually) hate attention…(I say “usually” because I am a girl after all, and we all have our moments of attention-whoredom)…but typically, attention weirds me out. Example:
The other day, someone I know pretty well told me that my eyes were the "coolest shade of green" they had ever seen. A normal person would politely say "thanks" and leave it at that...but not me. Nope. I have to make it awkward and start analyzing. Stupid brain! I get all freaked out and start thinking to myself "why are they looking at my eyes"..."that's weird, right?"..."now everyone in the room wants to look at my eyes"..."why did they have to say something"...yeah...it's so awkward. While I’m thinking all of this I’m trying to pretend (outwardly) that I'm totally chill. I'm such a social weirdo sometimes. They were just making an observation and trying to be nice. My brain tries to ruin everything. I need to work on that, I guess.
Anyway...back to the being single at 25 thing. I really do think I'm ready to find my "the one" and start a new part of my life. At the same time, there is still so much I'd like to do before I "settle" down (trust me though...I WILL NOT be settling). I want to start on my Master's and maybe do some traveling. Of course, I can those things while being in a relationship...easy-peasy.
The real predicament for me is this:
where does one meet the kind of guy I'd like to be married to? I know what kind of guy I DON'T want to be married to...I can give you a detailed list if you'd like...but ideally, I'd meet my "the one" in at a bookstore and he'd chat me up about the Star Wars book I’m currently holding and ask me to join him for coffee or a movie (*gasp!* or maybe even both!!) but realistically, that's not how life works. I realize this...really, I do. All of these eligible bachelors must be hanging out somewhere, right? Here are some options and they're cons:
High School: Well, wouldn’t that be lovely. High school sweethearts fall in love and live happily every after. Yada yada yada. Those days are long gone for me (thank you, Lord!). Looking back, I’m okay with that…there were only a few boys that might have been worth having one of those “high school sweetheart” stories to tell my kids…And I’m pretty sure they’re happily married now. So yeah…not gonna happen.
Concert: Not really ideal due to the noise issue, but otherwise great considering you have at least one thing in common…a really great band. But…..I'm totally one of those people who hates it when people talk to me while I’m enjoying a song by a band I really love (even if its on the radio...drives me crazy!). So, if my "the one" were to start chatting during the show, I fear I'd immediately judge him based on his lack of consideration. Not really his fault, but still. Also, the venue itself is a factor. A lot of bands play in bars. I don't really want to meet my "the one" in a bar. Not that I have anything against people who frequent bars (I mean, in this scenario, I too am in a bar, right?)...I just don't know...I’ve known people who have met in bars and they are super happy couples…I’m just not sure it’s for me.
Church: I hate even adding this one to my list of options. It seems wrong. Not wrong in the sense that I don't want to meet my "the one" at church, but wrong in the sense that I don't want people to think that I'm only at a church looking for a husband. That's shady business. Plus, I love my church. Sure, there are absolutely ZERO people of interest (in terms of dating) for me there, but I would feel terrible about going elsewhere just to meet someone...it seems selfish.
Work: This is just a terrible idea. You have to be around that person all the time. If you break up, it's awkward. It makes co-workers feel awkward. It's just not a great idea, although I'm sure you could find a legit reason to make an exception...maybe. But generally speaking...bad idea.
Mutual Friends: Here's a fun one. No offense to any one who is reading this, but mutual friends do not always make the best relationships. I mean, there is always a weird dynamic and once (if) you get over that there is still a little bit of loyalty awkwardness for someone. What if you break up? Who gets to keep the mutual friend? I'm not saying that this is always how it works out, but it's a very prevalent issue. I know tons of people who have met through mutual friends and it has worked out wonderfully...but there are still those that crash and burn and then they have to divvy up the “children” and someone always gets the raw deal….One person always sucks a life a little more than the other. It's ugly I tell you...ugly.
Don’t get me wrong, any of these places are perfectly fine for meeting your “the one”, but wouldn’t be nice if you knew exactly what kind of place you’d meet yours in? Then you could just hang out in those places all the time. I guess for now all I can do is be patient. I realize that this aspect of my life is out of my hands and is definitely not about my timing. The big man upstairs has someone picked out just for me (how cool is that!?) and I’m pretty excited to meet him one day. Until then…I wait…with that incessant ticking.
Peace.
-M
p
out
)